So, I don’t know if you’ve heard, but there’s a debate tonight. They say it’s going to be a Presidential debate – my gut tells me it could very well be more Junior High-ish – but it’s a debate all the same.
True story: I put “Junior High-ish” in that sentence as a placeholder, because it sucks and I know it and I wanted to use a better word there, something that means “unpresidential” but less obvious. But, someone next to me has (1) a sinus cold that can only be sucked in and never blown out and (2) a cough (unsurprising, on account of #1), and (3) a magical pile of potato chips (“magical” because I very carefully placed only one small handful on each plate and yet crunch crunch crunch each of those crunch crunch crunch handfuls has lasted crunch crunch crunch a damned eternity), and that just happens to be the trifecta of sensory overload that shuts my brain down and prevents me from thinking of phrases better than “Junior High-ish”. Since all my senses have skipped town, I turned to antonym.com for help on how to denote “unpresidential” without using a fakey-fake made-up word like “unpresidential.” And did you know that, in order to use antonym.com, you have to take a flipping test? Seriously, it was this whole bunch of (two) questions, all, “How important is styling to you when you buy a vehicle?” Why do you care, antonym.com? I’ve donated bodily fluids without answering so many questions. Then I started overthinking it, like, Am I supposed to answer in opposites? Is every day ‘opposite day’ on antonym.com? Is this a test to make sure I understand what an antonym is, before they bestow upon me the wisdom of the opposite word? Can I fail? WHY SO MUCH PRESSURE, ANTONYM.COM? WHY?
After I composed myself, I answered all their questions and waited in breathless anticipation for the word that would transform my lame opening paragraph into something spectacular. Downloading… downloading…
Antonym of presidential = unpresidential
“Junior High-ish” it is.
Crunch crunch crunch.
Anyway, Presidential debate. I’m a big fan of the debates, and usually start a post on Facebook and use the comments feed to share my stream-of-consciousness reactions to what’s happening on the screen. And last week, in the days following the VP debate, some kind people said some nice things about my VP debate commentary; they were probably just being polite but it really doesn’t matter because, you see, I’m a praise junkie. A trick monkey in a human suit, really – wave some treats and positive reinforcement my way, and I am super trainable. All of which gave me the idea to bring my debate reactions here, in the form of a live blog. And when I asked my Facebook friends if it was a good idea, 200 people said nothing but four said yes, and since those four used bunches of exclamation points, their votes count more, and here we are.
DEBATE LIVE BLOG!
This will be my first attempt at live blogging, and it turns out that my WordPress platform actually doesn’t support live blogging. So I’m MacGuyvering myself a workaround that, hopefully, will not only work, but also not send you all 3,000 email alerts for a post update. My success at this is likely going to closely linked to my progress in Salon’s Presidential Debate Drinking Game, so. We’ll see.
My ask of all of you: I DON”T WANT TO LIVE BLOG SPAM YOU. If I am, it means I have to adjust a specific setting, which I’ll do, if I know. So give a shout out if I am, send me hateful comments, or whatever – just let me know.
And my other ask: Come hang out here tonight, starting at about 8:45 pm Eastern! Pour yourself a glass of wine, put your feet up, and make ample use of the Comments box below – I love comments and discussion and they will enhance the whole debate experience.
See you then!